What’s Really Working In Your Life?
Hey friends!
It seems like we’re constantly being told to fix this or fix that about our relationships, our personalities, and our businesses. E-newsletters ask me if I’m procrastinating, if I’m afraid to sell, if I playing small, if I’m holding back, etc.
Maybe it makes more sense to concentrate on what’s really working in our lives and continue to do more of whatever that is. Expanding our greatest strengths forms the core of the burgeoning strengths movement. To keep this movement going, we’ll need to wean ourselves off of measuring everything in our lives to “see how we’re doing” or “how we compare to others.”
The problem with most metrics is that they keep you focused on the negative. Based on the results (often seemingly arbitrary), your boss, your teacher, your doctor or some other person of supposed authority in your life directs you to shore up your alleged weaknesses.
I say alleged because our society tends to fixate on weaknesses. I don’t believe in trying to fix weaknesses. Instead, I prefer to encourage and grow a person’s natural interests and inclinations. It’s pretty futile to force someone to get “good” at something they don’t care for.
Take math. I never liked math. It didn’t interest me. I wasn’t “good” at it. Yet, I spent a lot of time taking all kinds of math classes thinking I needed to be good in math. I even got a job that required me to do quite a bit of math. It started to eat me up alive because I didn’t want to do it.
Looking in life’s rear view mirror I can see now that the time I spent taking math classes kept me from taking more English classes and writing classes or just plain writing.
I loved writing and ended up doing math. Now that I’ve been back writing for about ten years, I feel like I’m where I want to be, where I was meant to be, where I got detoured from.
Our visits to Earth seem increasingly short to me, why not spend most of your precious time on this beautiful planet doing what you enjoy.
I’d love to hear what’s working in your life. What do you want more of in your life?
Muse thx,
Giulietta
RSS
In general, Guilietta, I agree. There is no doubt that North American culture spends too much time focussed on where we need to improve to fit into somebody else’s concept of who we should be. And we’re bombarded everyday by messages telling us to compare ourselves to two dimensional idols.
While I do think that there can be some good in taking a look in the mirror on a regular basis and being frankly honest with ourselves, it has to be in service to the goal of staying humble and becoming the best version of us that we can aspire to.
Thanks for this!
Hi Michael,
Thoughtful comment as usual!
What you say about versions made me realize that each one of us is a novel in progress, discarding versions/drafts that no longer work for us, adding/trying out new characters, new scenes. Even though we think we haven’t been published yet or are waiting to be published or thinking we aren’t good enough to be published, we as a novel are constantly being published.
I love it when something someone says leads me into something else. This is something I love to do!
Thx for stopping by.
Giulietta
Giulietta –
I’m a huge proponent of focusing on our strengths – after all that is why they are strengths. Leave spending time on our weaknesses for another life! At the moment I’m really enjoying rediscovering my easy going, fun loving self and exploring that – it’s going really well. Great post as always – thank you!
Phil
Excellent Phil! I’m glad you’re celebrating your fun loving self. Sounds like a super way to go through life…
Thx, G.
Thank you for this important reminder to focus on the things that work. It is such a shame that we are taught to focus on the holes in the fabric of our lives when indeed there is a rich and lovely pattern if we are willing to look.
And thank you for your insightful comment on my blog!
Love your blog!
Yes, it’s all about the pattern. I believe we have a pattern. To try and alter it takes away from the uniqueness. We seem to want to homogenize our one-of-a-kind life quilt!
Thx G.
Glad to have found you! I love your insight. Strengths and passion usually are connected–I agree with you indulge in them.
Of course, I want more family time in my life. Best times are with my family!
When I was in TV news, I got asked to speak at a lot of career days. I didn’t tell the students how they could have my job one day; I asked them to think about the subjects they liked, the activities they enjoyed most… and to start learning about different careers they could have doing those things. Funny– I also I told them how I loved English and how I did NOT love math. They seemed relieved to hear that it was okay to not like something… rather than resisting that feeling.
Terry,
I’m glad you stopped by too! Indulge is a great word … Here’s to lots of time with your family.
Angie –
Now, that’s an empowering career day. Don’t recall any adults ever suggesting I try to make a living doing what I enjoyed most. The “life as suffering” mentality starts early on.
Funny about the math. The world is headed for an idea shortage if all students learn the same things. A really wide span of knowledge and natural interests makes more sense!
thx. G.
Oh yeah. Loving that we can see what we’re good at and do more of that. The funny thing is that the things we’re weak at, other people are strong at! So if we all took care of nurturing our own strengths, we’d be really awesome together. Great synergy.
What do I want more of in my life? I choose to have deeper more restful sleep. In the recent past it’s been a little wonky b/c of some medication I’ve been on after being in the hospital. It will be over soon and I’ll be focusing on sleep big time.
What’s working: Taking care of my health – physical and emotional. I’m doing great! I am juicing and healing and moving my body with love and soaking up sunlight and it’s all so good.
I Love you. Thank you.