Merge Your Work & Play Personas
Nothing like a rebellious Monday to get me thinking in new and varied ways!
You’ve probably noticed that everyone is suddenly talking about authenticity in business. Be yourself. Let your true self out. Be real. Despite all the social media talk, I still feel many folks — even the ones advising others to do it — have one persona for work and one for play. Or even a work one that stretches out a bit for play.
Why have we been taught to put on a business face for work? Is that supposed to get us more business? Get us promoted?
Frankly, even the word authentic feels inauthentic when talking about people. I might use it to find out if a piece of furniture is a real antique, but for people? It comes across as cold. I want warm! That’s what I associate with a human — being real, being alive.
In my twenties I know I came across as cold. That’s because I was scared to be myself, scared a wild, rebellious lass would get in trouble like I did in elementary school. So, I held myself back out of fear, to avoid being punished. It made for a very unhappy decade. Thank god, I warmed myself up through singing in my thirties.
If you want to really be yourself, start being the same person no matter what situation you find yourself in, no matter who is standing in front of you, no matter what his or her job title or income is. Remember, it’s just a job title, it doesn’t mean this person is better than you or smarter than you or more worthy than you or that they want you to act different in front of them. That just divides people: from each other and from themselves.
I’d love to hear from some of you. Do you divide your personality into work & play? Or, if you don’t, perhaps share some of your secrets?
Muse thx,
Giulietta
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Great topic, Guilietta! I find this question at play in my work as a performing singer-songwriter. The work of writing songs, for me, is all about being real and authentic, as is performing the music on stage – and even recording the music for that matter. But the act of “self-marketing” seems to change the relationship to the listener (audience, promoter, music-buying public, etc.)- I am asking something specific of them – that makes it a challenge for me somehow to remain my “self” – truly authentic. As always, it’s just a matter of tweaking my perspective slightly. Curious how that is for others.
Hi Barbara,
Thanks for stopping by. You’ve mentioned the ultimate “mind” challenge for so many small business owners. Why do we start to feel icky once we move into sell mode? One way to overcome that is to transform the idea of selling into sharing and helping. If you know you can help someone solve their problem, then think of selling as just giving this person more information or encouragement to make that decision. Haven’t you been in a store and wanted to buy something to solve your problem but didn’t get that extra help you needed to make a yes or no decision? Don’t you sometimes want a push? By nature or nurture (or both), we seem to be ambivalent about taking action, even action that can move us to greatness. It seem easiest to languish in the land of non-action. Hope that helps!
Muse thx,
Giulietta