Sing first. Then do the boring stuff.
Hey folks breaking out of your moldy molds,
I just responded to a tweet on twitter with the above sentence. And it hit me like a giant idea log, “good blog post title.”
Way too much of life is backwards. It makes no sense.
Are you carving time out of your must do life to actually do something you’d like? Seriously, who made up this script we’re all following? If it were a movie, no one would venture into the theaters to see it, the screenwriter would be out of work and there wouldn’t be any sequels.
Make time for the life you want to remember at the end of your life. (Good place to plant a link for my latest Skirt! essay on creativity, The Starry Night.)
I hate to get morbid here, but we squander most of our precious lives doing stuff most of us don’t even care about. We’ve been trained to do that, to stand in line at the post office obediently without speaking up to say, “Can you get some more help out here?” We’ve been trained to sit at desks and “learn,” as if you can’t learn scampering through the woods with your dad looking at the inside of flowers or something you choose for yourself. (Highly recommend Weapons of Mass Instruction. I even donated a copy to my local library.) Think about it — we sit at desks most of the sunny day starting at a wee age for TWELVE YEARS. (Some schools are canning recess completely and schools are being built-playground free.)
No wonder the body breaks down. It wasn’t mean to be rigid like that or our parts wouldn’t move. Then if we or our parents agree to fork over $150,000+, we get to sit at more desks for four more years. That’s followed – usually for another twenty-five years – by more desk sitting. (Unless you are a teacher, then you get a choice to sit or stand.)
If someone said to you at age 5, are you willing to spend the bulk of your life sitting at a desk ingesting things/doing things someone else chooses for you, you’d think they were crazy, right? wrong?
Here’s an idea. Round up all the boring stuff you usually put at the top of your spirit-numbing to do list and move it down to the bottom. Now you can sing …
What do you feel about the script you follow? Do you write your own, follow a hybrid?
Muse thx,
G.
p.s. another plug for my essay writing adventure where your life desires will be revealed a little more each week – it always comes out in your writing, which is an exercise in letting go and you taking charge for a change. Perhaps, move your desire to write to the top of the list. The more you “sing,” the more you’ll have to write about. And you can write standing up, while you walk or even speak into a recording gadget if you’re dancing in your laundry room/disco. (I’ve got one.) Hope to see you for a liberating experience!
RSS
This idea is circling through my head as I do all I can to avoid the work that awaits – the work that has to get done and that I don’t like doing! I wonder, at times, if I could do what I love and really make it work… and yet to narrow it down to the “one” thing that I love… I have never quite understood how people do that!
Hey TE,
I’m a fellow variety is the spice of life person. This notion to do ONE thing that you love, is kinda like eating your favorite ice cream all day – you will probably get sick of it.
Think this uni-approach to work needs to be giving a nice shove out the door.
Try making a list of all that you love and pick 5. Even stuff you wouldn’t ever believe you could get money for like say buying greeting cards.
I’m also an Erin Brockovich type and do that naturally in my town. Am also moving in that direction mula-wise.
We’ve been so restrained since early childhood that it can be hard to go where no one has gone before.
I’ll hop by your site soon to see what you’ve been up to!
Thanks again for stopping by, G.
You know my story, G. I moved the mind-numbing stuff so far down the list that it fell right off. There are sacrifices that have to be made to do that, mostly financial (which I haven’t found to be worth crying over yet), but now I have all this free time to write. Without a doubt, changing the priorities was the best decision I ever made.
Hi Michael!
Great they fell off, good place for them. I’m glad you changed priorities, too. That’s what really needs to happen. When people say they don’t have time to do the things they love, they mean they don’t want to make time to do the things they love.
We can be in charge of our own lives if we choose to take on that mission.
Thx, G.
Absolutely right! Who made up this script that so many people sell their souls to follow? It’s a boring script and you couldn’t pay me enough to watch the movie version.
Too many people live their days like the fun has been beaten out of them and they always inspire me to never want to be like that.
Hi Belinda,
Great quote and ultra true,”Too many people live their days like the fun has been beaten out of them.”
Fun doesn’t have to go last in our lives. It can go first. We just need to make that decision.
I’m putting together a list of courses I believe schools ought to “offer.” Fun is one of them. At the moment everything’s completely disconnected from life.
Appreciate the comment! G.
I try and wake up every morning and figure out what fun Im going to have today! What can I do to make myself laugh til I cry? It beats dreading the schedule ahead. Awesome post and just what I needed tonight!
All the best,
Lisa
Hey Lisa,
Welcome! Love your opening credits method to life in the morning. Laughing until you cry. That’s one of my favorite fun activities. And then you start bending at the waist because it’s so funny you can’t hold your head up. I took a quick cyber trip to your site and like your new post. I’ve got TONS of posts to turn into articles. Will leave a comment. Have turned a few into essays, so this is a new use! Thanks, G.
This really answered my drawback, thank you!
Hi Mia,
How nice of you to swing by from Twitter. Glad to be of assistance! Thanks for visiting me and my blog! Have a “fun” day. G.
la la la la la! and
LA!
Thanks for reminding me to sing this morning. Off to rearrange my to-do list.
Actually, today my kids are accounted for and it’s my scheduled work day. I’ll remember this post when I’m tempted to use this time to tackle my “to-do’s” instead of write my book.
Angie,
What a lovely singing voice you have!
Now, that’s a nice idea. Sing when we get up so we start the day off feeling energized and enthusiastic.
Got an idea for a writer’s “want to do” list:
Sing
write the book
write the book
write the book
write the book.
Thx, G.
I love “The Starry Night.” What a wonderful story. I loved it when she asked why Gene took her out to the stars and he said it was because she hadn’t given up yet.
It took me a long time to realize that writing was my starry night. It is the one time when I am totally content, especially when the words just flow by themselves. Most of my writing isn’t planned, but I simply sit down and start…letting the words come together in their own way.
I am in the process of learning to write fiction, that is short stories. This is a bit more daunting for me because I can’t just free write; structure is a part of this.
I struggle against the discipline. It makes my singing voice not as smooth as I’d like and my throat gets a bit sore but I haven’t given up yet. I want to learn this song:~)
I like your site very much!
Afternoon Sara!
Thanks for the kind words about Starry Night. Self-revelations, like yours about writing, can take awhile. We need to unlearn what others have insisted we “learn,” so we can choose our own direction and desires. Glad you found your Starry Night.
Great to be venturing into fiction. In high school, I wrote fiction. Now, only non-fiction, although I’ve recently gotten an impulse to pursue fiction. James Joyce wrote without much structure. You can too!
Keep singing!
Giulietta
Oh yeah, sing it, Sistah! I’d do a duet with you anytime, G. And one thing I’ve realized is that it’s really about giving people some darn autonomy and personal freedom about how they go about their days and their lives and their work. Such a blind spot in our world, especially our culture of work. But it doesn’t have to be like that. And I’ve learned that what may be fatally boring and a total waste of time to me might just be someone else’s cup of tea, but if they don’t get to assert their independence around it they will be miserable. This is something that shows up for almost every single one of my clients. So thanks much for writing about it in your inimitable way.
p.s. I loved Starry Night too. So touching.
Hi Patty,
You’ve hit it the human nail on the head with this comment. Yes, giving folks the “freedom” to design their lives, including work and school. A total blind spot as you say.
The one size fits all, standardized testing, standardized desk sitting, standardized homes, standardized shopping malls, standardized life, isn’t freedom and it’s destroying people’s souls. Yes, you’re free to follow the plan, the only plan. If you deviate from that we’re going to make you regret it. I say make them regret it, so we won’t regret our lives.
Many thanks for this brilliance! G.
I particularly *love* this one! 🙂
The “blind spot” – as Patty says – creates a hole, a vacuum, an “asleep at the wheel” mentality for so many going through life, unaware that they have a song to sing in the first place. Unaware that they could truly be happier, unaware of their ownership in their future, unaware that they really can make change in their own lives, one baby step at a time.
I have so been here, and was lucky to have someone close to me notice it and gently wake me up to a new direction.
How do we reach those people? The ones who don’t know they are stuck? The ones who are resigned to the daily grind that keeps them chained to their desks?
Just a question I challenge myself with every day.
Thanks G., and thanks to all the folks who’ve commented above, for the re-awakening this morning.
~Kim
Good to hear from you Kim!
Yes, lots of folks asleep at the wheel. We come into the world awake, then our supervisors lull us to a sleepwalking state, so we’ll be easier to manage.
Eyes open, everything else shut.
Happy that someone gently woke you up. I experienced the same favor from a variety of people who had managed to wake themselves up.
Just trying to pass the favor along.
See you singing somewhere in the Greater Boston area soon! G.
Beautiful points.
I start my day with what I want to create. It sets the stage.
From there, I move my big rocks first, to make a glide path for the rest of the day. And so they don’t loom.
If my big rocks keep getting in the way, or taking away, from my creative best, then I limit them with time and boundaries.
I have found that I need to carve either enough space before my big rocks of the day, or that I need a good transition from my day, back into my best creative modes.
I’ve also found that I have creative sweet spots, like in the early morning, or late at night, or on the weekends.
Hi J.D.
Need to get over to your great blog!
Great analogy with the big rocks. You’re right that they can start an avalanche rumbling down through your creative territory.
I’m with you on the sweet spots. Many times I wake up at 3 am with the missing sentence or idea or theme or concept. Find I like to write after 9 PM.
Thank you! G.
Hi Giulietta,
You ask, “Are you carving time out of your must do life to actually do something you’d like?”
Your question made me feel guilty, ashamed, angry at the world and its demands, and defiant.
For half a lifetime, I worked hard at a career I liked but was not my life’s dream. When I finally was able to do this, to write my book(s), I sang. Oh, how I sang as I wrote my way into penury, homelessness, and major medical problems. I didn’t mind because I was doing what I really wanted -writing full-time- even though I was often in pain and dependent on the kindness of others.
Then I found what I thought was the perfect solution: work part-time and write part-time, but somewhere along the way, my singing slowed to a lull except for an occasional outburst.
The world has intruded again, its “must do” monster’s fangs smothering my song to almost a whisper.
However, I haven’t lost hope. My songs are welling up inside me, ready to burst out – as soon as the monster of the “must do” life retreats.
Hi Penelope,
What a lovely comment – an essay in and of itself! The “must-do monster fangs”? Great metaphor and so accurate. Like we get carried away each day dangling from the monster.
Maybe get some anti-monster repellent? I look forward to more of your “singing.” The world needs it! Thx, G.
I love the title of this post (it makes my heart sing!) and I felt so happy while reading what you wrote. Because I’ve been doing this lately! I’ve been putting the endless To-Dos at the end of the day and putting my creativity first.
It has taken a little experimenting, some trial and error, to figure out how to do that in ways that really nurture me (I found out that giving over completely to what a I want to do is another extreme that leaves me feeling overwhelmed when I have to catch up :~) But even the trial and error has been fun. And I’m already feeling more contented with my life. Not bad for 10 days into the New Year (and a huge improvement on previous New Years).
Thanks for another fun and heartfelt post!
~ Milli
Hi Milli,
Good to hear your heart is singing. Congrats on the trial and error adventure to nurture yourself. Contentment — such a good stress-free feeling. That’s really the message here. Enjoy your life! I will check out Stop Listening. It beckons me to read it. thx, G.