Do you live a permission-based life?
Hey rebellious ones,
Most of us spent our youths waiting to get permission from parents or teachers to do the things we wanted to do. Then we went to work and got permission from our bosses to do the things we wanted to do. It eased us gently or not-so-gently into a permission-based life, where we ask others of all ages if it’s o.k. to do the things we want to do.
By the time we reach mid-life, many folks have instituted a self-imposed restraining order to the point they don’t even ask permission anymore. Even that’s been beaten out of them.
I semi went along with getting permission until I went on a bike trip to Europe in the early 90’s. A few of us went down to the beach and started walking along the shore. About 15 minutes later, I noticed a no trespassing sign, stopped and obediently said, “Hey, we should turn around.” One woman with a fiery spirit kept walking. She said, “If someone doesn’t want us to be here, they’ll let us know.”
Her words started me in my tracks! They got me going forward. They empowered me to stop living a permission-based life. If I get a great idea and someone wants to be a barrier, I simply go around them. My philosophy? They’ll see how great what I’m doing is and want to join in. If not, oh well! It’s a great way to take back your power …
How about you, have you ever lived a permission-based life? If liberated, how does that feel?
Muse thx,
Giulietta
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Hey Giulietta,
Yes, I lived that life for a long time. The details are boring, but they don’t matter too much anymore (save for the lessons I learned). The important part is that I’m free now.
And liberation feels pretty damned good. There’s more responsibility, but it’s mine now, and I kinda like that.
Keep leaning into the light…
Giulietta, thank you for another challenging thought and such an apt description for the lives so many people now lead – a permission-based life.
Tell me about it in Japan – a permission-based culture unparalleled. On the other hand, don’t tell me about it any more. Liberation is infinitely, gloriously preferable. And it becomes possible in that first gleam in the mind that asks, “and why not?”
Thank you for visiting and commenting on my blog, Giulietta. Early morning greetings from the mountains to you – Catrien Ross.
Michael,
Congrats on your liberation! Excellent point that being your own keeper requires more responsibility. It does and it’s worth it on just about every level.
Catrien,
Yes, more of us need to adopt a “why not?” attitude. Why not, why not?
Thanks for visiting us from the mountains. I studied Japan in 4th grade. Isn’t most of Japan mountainous? I’m not sure that’s the image many have. Am a geography nut.
Thanks! G.
I would love to be as brave as that woman. I tend to follow the rules, at first, then I come to my own senses. I’ll never forget the day my mom said (as I was dying on inside, suffering in a job I hated) “You have more power than you know.” Those words started me in my own tracks! Thank you, Giulietta for another inspiring post.
Hi Angie,
Your mother is wise. Most people never realize how much power they have. Congrats on discovering yours …
Thx. G.
Giulietta, yes, Japan is mostly mountainous and the area where I live is described as more than 80% mountains. Mount Fuji is here, too, and the surrounding five lakes formed by volcanic activity in the geologic past. My publishing company is based at the center I established here – just a few minutes walk from the beautiful Lake Kawaguchi.
I share your love of geography.
sounds gorgeous! Thx for the additional info. G.
Giulietta –
You’re right. We get to the point where we’re so conditioned by the world around us that we place artificial limits on ourselves. It’s awesome that you blow these away and help others to do the same. I’m right with you redifining what is possible! Nice post G!
Phil
Thanks for stopping by Phil,
I like “blow these away.” Nice, rebellious words. Let’s get out of our possibility restraints …
g.
In essence, while I agree with your stance on a permission-based life, from experience I feel it is necessary to learn and know where to draw the line.
My situation has been the reverse: a no-permission life. This means that while not stopped or hindered by obstacles in my path, I also blundered into situations beyond my control to manage. In retrospect, I wish there had been more a bit more control, more permission required situations as they might have made me more careful about leaping over fences into prohibited areas.
A no permission life can make one careless with it, flaunting permission granted limits and creating obstacles where there are none.
Two ways of looking at this question.
Congrats on another thought-provoking piece.
Hey Pennie,
Thanks for another view on a permission-based life. I’m intrigued by what you say, especially “leaping over fences into prohibited areas.” How would your life have been different if others had restrained you more?
Much thx for visiting again, G.