Take Back Your Life!

Getting More Me Time.

Most of us are overloaded with responsibilities. So much so that we can feel guilty taking time out for ourselves to do something we really need, something that makes us feel connected to ourselves.

If this sounds like you, please sit yourself down in a quiet space with a cup of tea/java and take a few deep breaths. Then ask your “inner busy bee” where your hyper responsibility comes from and why you feel that someone else’s life will fall apart if you take out time for yourself. I say this, because that’s what folks have told me. “I have to do X or my “fill-in-the-blank” won’t get “fill-in-the-blank.” (more…)

“Whatever it is your heart desires, please go for it, it’s yours to have.” ~ Gloria Estefan

Too many of us put off living our most glorious lives. We use all sorts of excuses to stay emotionally safe: when I get more money, when the kids get older, when I retire, when we downsize, etc.
The problem with the do-it-later philosophy is that today’s excuses get replaced with tomorrow’s excuses. Ten years go by and you are still meaning to take that improv class or hike up Mt. Fuji or write a memoir about your childhood roaming through the rain forests of Borneo.

We act like our lives will last forever and we’ve got plenty of time to do that “X” we’ve always wanted to do. It’s hard to know how much time any of us has on the planet. All I’m sure about is that I have today and that’s the best time to commit to something new. Don’t think you are alone. I put off things as well. (more…)

As a young child, I felt powerful.

I used to speak my mind, entertain adults with my provocative personality and roam the neighborhood in search of adventures. School definitely put a lid on my power. Way too many of my teachers wanted to tame me, put me in a box, turn me into some obedient little clone. I tried to fight it and ended up in corners, in hallways, in detention, etc.

They just keep working me until I retreated into myself and went along with the mind and soul numbing program.

Why do we do this to kids and young adults and think it’s a good idea? (more…)

I love Yes! Magazine and its tagline: Powerful Ideas, Practical actions. Every issue comes jam packed with new ways to look at the way we humans do things.

The article titled “Survival of the Nicest” in the spring 2013 issue caught my eye right away. Runs contrary to what I’ve been raised to believe about my fellow humans.

Hello all,

Beginning something new can be really hard for people. They get scared they will fail, so they don’t even start. The right answer syndrome is the most likely culprit. Years of being trained to only see one answer acts as an anti-catalyst. People don’t want to be wrong. They don’t want to fail. They don’t want to feel embarrassed.

We all need encouragement to try new things, to go for new adventures, to try all the things we want to do but that often get relegated to life’s back burner. I had a boyfriend encourage me to sing when I’d been told I had a terrible voice. As it turns out, I didn’t have a terrible voice. His encouragement changed my life. Make that, saved my life. It had a ripple effect across my entire being – from my enthusiasm to my attitude to my self-esteem.  Thank you ex-boyfriend! (more…)

About 3 years ago, I wrote a blog post about the masks I’d worn, taken off and still have fragments of to remove. I got nervous right before hitting the send key because I thought, it’s too rad for folks. Well, that post got more comments than just about any post. It spoke to readers.

Yesterday, while patrolling the supermarket aisle in search of organic items (or was it meaning?), the title for this month’s newsletter popped into my head. Everyone Is Beautiful When They Take Off Their Masks.

If you take off your metaphorical mask, you will expose the underneath you, the one you’ve been taught to hide or hold in check or be ashamed to reveal.

The beautiful human you. The vulnerable you.  (more…)

Dear Reader,

Today is Day Five of the 12 Days of Love Letter Writing, a terrific holiday program started by the kind and caring Hannah Brencher. You can read about Hannah, the genesis of this program and listen to her Ted Talk at More Love Letters. These are not gushy love letters. They are letters of encouragement and support written with love.

Hannah asked me to write a love letter to Johnathan. His friend described Johnathan’s situation as follows:

“Johnathan celebrated sixth months sober just a few days ago. In his short two decades of life he’s seen parents divorce, a brother die, and numerous friends stunted by drug addiction. He was just recently promoted at work and is finally feeling better about his life and his self. His letter requester wrote, ‘I believe that I will not always be a part of his life, although we are both major supports for each other right now. I want for Johnathan to learn and always remember that no matter how many people he loses, there will always be more love to be found and that he will never have to be alone as long as he remembers never to stop searching for the light.'” (more…)

I didn’t realize how much time had passed since my last post! Am life-deep in trying to get a creativity (off) center up and running in my town. I’m meeting so many people! Everywhere I go I just walk up to folks and ask if they want to be involved in some way with the project, beginning with getting on my email list. Almost everyone says yes! Was going to post info about my trip to the Mark Twain Museum in Hartford, but will do that perhaps next week.

I’ve also been enthralled with the 29 Days Of Giving Challenge I started on September 15th. It’s been remarkable to say the least. Every day I need to find someone or something to be thankful for and find a way to show that. I openly compliment people more. I drop off little gifts. I show gratitude to unexpected things like the gorgeous maple tree in my yard or my legs for being strong enough to take me around the neighborhood. (more…)

Well, I’m on day three of my 29 day giving adventure. Really supportive on-line community at 29 gifts! at All sorts of ideas for giving keep popping into my head. Really gets you out of your head and into your heart.

For today’s giving, I wanted to thank all my readers, past and present, for your support. Was reading my latest issue of Rolling Stone and stumbled on this project from Val Kilmer and thought it might resonate with you. Last spring he performed “Citizen Twain” a neat one-man play where he’s Mark Twain talking to the audience about what still bugs him and about the way we treat each other. I hope it comes to Boston. I’d love to see it. He got standing ovations every night. (more…)

I’m on this constant non-fiction book adventure. One book enters my life and it leads me to another, and so on and so forth.

Recently, I picked up 29 Gifts: How A Month of Giving Can Change Your Life.

Something about making someone else’s life easier appeals to me. I see so much suffering in the world that I’ve begun to wonder if giving is the answer to all the world’s problems.

The author, Cami Walker, develops MS a month after her wedding. She ends up in a lot of pain, on a lot of prescription drugs, and with a compromised quality of life. Then she meets Mbali Creazzo, an African medicine woman. Her prescription for Cami’s MS? Give away 29 gifts in 29 days. And so Cami does.

Mbali says, “The best way to attract abundance into your life is to be in a perpetual state of giving and gratitude.”

Most of the gifts are small and simple like saving a seat, buying a homeless man tacos, passing along a book, offering some kind words, writing a friend a letter, spending time with a friend or giving your cat a belly rub. But she also suggests giving away something you feel you can’t live without. I did this about 4 years ago. I gave my sister a new shirt I loved because she said she liked it but didn’t have the money to buy it because of her layoff. At first I didn’t think I could give away the shirt. It was mine. It was pretty. It was rare. Then I decided that’s exactly why I should give it away — to liberate myself from materials things.

Cami feels stronger and better with each day of gift giving. She stops needing her cane to walk around the block, takes on consulting jobs, gets closer to her husband. She comes alive and says, “Today, I’m part of a large group of people committee to the vision of a worldwide goodwill movement. Our collective mission is to create a grass roots revival of the giving spirit in the world.”

I love that reason to get up in the morning! Beautiful.

Cami also mentions one of Mahatma Gandhi’s coolest quotes, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” Volunteering on various town committees in service to my town gave my life a whole new dimension in fullness. I meet other giving folks and make a lasting impact in my own backyard, which ripples across the planet.

I’m going to do this 29 gifts beginning September 15 and blog about it every few weeks. If you, too, want to give 29 gifts, please visit Cami’s site and sign up: 29 Day Giving Challenge.